Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Lay Ministry Weekend

This weekend was a great weekend for me. I always love when I get to go on my Lay Weekends because it gives me a renewal of spirit. I have to be honest with all my blogging friends. I have not been going to church or walking in my faith like I should. This weekend and Sunday has given me a renewed spirit that I hope will last my lifetime. I don't know if you all know about the Lay ministry that Anthony and I are involved in so I will briefly explain it.

As Lay people, we go to different churches on weekends and minister to the churches. We minister to them in a variety of ways. When we do what we call Lay Renewal Weekends. It’s exactly what it says. We go in and lead sharing groups and the services. It’s like a big D-Now for the whole church. It is to create a revival in the church. When we do Lay Ministry Weekends, it is usually after they have already done the Lay Renewal Weekend. We go in and teach the importance of Spiritual Gifts, Ministry and the how it relates to our daily lives. In all the weekends, as the Holy Spirit leads we share our testimonies. This was not always what I like to do but it seemed to have an effect on people. We don't do the weekends for ourselves, we do them to build up the Kingdom of God. We usually get more out of the weekends than the church does really.

This was a really excited weekend for me. I had always known that Christians had spiritual gifts but never really knew the importance of them. I guess that is because this is the first time in the 3 years I've been saved that I really heard about it. Spiritual Gifts are given to only believers in Christ. It is a supernatural ability that is given by the Holy Spirit when we get saved to enable us to minister and serve. They are not to be confused with Talents. Spiritual Gifts are given to us to create a lifestyle of Ministry. Everyone (Believers) are called, gifted, equipped, and sent by Jesus to ministry to the world around us. It very important that we know what our gifts are so that we can effectively minister to others. There are lots of ways to find out what your gift(s) are either through study (prayer), trial and error, tools that analyze, or input from other Christians. I think that it is easier to find your gift through ministry that it is to find a ministry to fit your gift. Your Spiritual gift is something that your enjoy doing or passionate about that you can use for the Glory of God. Now this is not to say that the only ministry you can do has to involve your Spiritual Gift. That is not true. We have things that God has commanded us to do that are not comfortable for us to do and don't involve our Spiritual Gift. We are still commanded to do these things. We are given Spiritual gifts to motivate us to minister to the lost. Wouldn't you rather do something you like than something you don't? This is what all I learned this weekend. Now I was really nervous going into this weekend because I have not been involved in my church like I am suppose to be. I even thought about backing out but I knew that this is what I needed to do this weekend. God provided everything that I needed to accomplish His will for this weekend.

What really stuck on my heart was the passage in 2 Peter 1:10-11. Ready from 3-11 but basically what 10-11 is saying is that there is an urgency to make sure that we are all saved. It can also be interoperated as making sure that we are doing what God has called us to do; that we are living the life worthy of the calling. A lot of times we get scared about what other people may say or if they will still be our friends if we stand up for what we believe but in Isaiah 43:5 it says "DO NOT BE AFRAID, FOR I AM WITH YOU" God is going to take care of all our worries and fears if we would just step out in faith and believe in him. He is not asking for much just our lives. Wouldn't it be so much easier and simpler if we let someone else tell us what to do and how to live our lives? Well God wants to be that person. He wants us to give our all to him and in return He will bless us not only in this life but the life after this one as well! Sounds like a pretty good deal to me. I have wasted so many years of my life doing what I wanted to do and not caring about the people around me or God. I am tired of wasting my life away. I know that I am still young enough to start now and make a difference.

So I have committed my life to the ministry of Christ. I by no means am an evangelist, but I do have the gift of knowledge and prophesy. I want to take what I am learning in the Bible, what God is speaking to me through the word and tell the world about it. I don't know where God will lead me but I will go. I pray that you all will do the same! God loves ya and I love ya!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Know of any Jobs?

Well, we still have not heard anymore about the job in CO except for that they are working on it. I really hope that works out but in the mean time Anthony has told me to start looking for him a job. At this point, he is willing to move wherever. We are both tired of this being apart crap. Its no fun at all. Four weeks away is really tough on both of us. So if you know of any place that is needing a dependable employee with a BS in Business Administration let us know!

Monday, March 23, 2009

Great Week & Weekend!

It's been awhile since I have posted. Mostly because Anthony got home and when he is home I have no time for anything! I love having him home it is just very tiring especially when he is only home for a week. We did get to spend a lot of quality time to together when he was here this time. He got home late late Thursday night, 3/19. I was suppose to work on Friday and I had a list of chores for him today before we left to go to AL. Well I woke up Friday morning with my eyes really irritated and decided to finally go to the Dr about them. So he spent his morning taking care of me! I had pink eye. Apparently I have had it off and on since JULY! I know crazy right! well it's better now! We went to AL for the weekend had a great time! We got to celebrate Ian's 43rd. Birthday with him! Monday night we had a blast! We got to have a "Date Night". I love these nights because they are so much fun. We didn't intend to have a date night. We didn't get dressed up or anything we were just going out to get something to eat! I let Anthony pick since he doesn't get to eat out much anymore. He wanted to go to Cracker Barrel. When we got seated Anthony grab the peg game and started playing. We both at one point knew how to beat it but couldn't remember. Well I have YOUTUBE on my phone now and looked up how to beat the game. As I was trying to keep up with the video, Our waiter comes by and says "Did you YouTube that?" I started laughing and said yes. Well I love to look around the store there so Anthony let me. I was getting a candle for my host mom for this weekend. Anthony found a dress that he had to get for Addy. As we were waiting for them to wrap the gifts, we found the funny greeting cards and started reading them and cracking up! After that we decided to get a movie and go back home. We when to Walgreens to the
Redbox but there was a line. I told Anthony I needed a few thing for the house lets just go in and get them the come back out and get the movie. Well we ended up in the card section again and we listening and dancing to the musical cards! I know that sound dorky but we really had a good time laughing and playing together! We ended up having to go to the Movie Gallery to get the movie. We rented Australia. It was a really good love movie!
Anthony left on Wednesday about lunch time. :( He went and stayed with his cousin Jennifer & Jason so he would have to drive overnight again!
Thursday night my cousin Jonathan came over and I cooked dinner for him and his friend. Me, Field, and Amie then went to play Frisbee. I thought we were going to play ultimate but we played Urban instead. I totally suck but it was fun to be out and around people. I have decided that I am going to start going out and playing ultimate Frisbee on Thursday nights! I might even get good at it! ha ha
Friday I cut grass and was suppose to just chill out this weekend. Do some work at the office Saturday and go to church on Sunday. Well Field messages me and asks what I'm doing this weekend. I say nothing and he said "river?" I said "Sure!!!" I have been to the River 3 times and have never gone out on the River. Well he didn't pick me up until like 12ish and its about a 2 hour drive. There were 7 of us there. Field, Keri, Austin, Emily, Mari, Diana, and me.
Saturday we waited for Mari and her sister Diana to get there. I had no idea they were coming so I was really excited to see them. We got out on the river about 11. I say about because we didn't have any cell phone reception so our phones were useless and time was just not important when your down there. We were going to go out on the boat and get something to eat at this place Field likes. It was about an hour boat ride. We had to cross the Pontchartrain. The waves were so big and the boat would hit them and go in the air! It was so much fun! It was really cold though and we got so wet. When we got back we got showered and went to walmart to pick up some thing to cook supper with. After we ate we played some games. And ended the night with a dip in the River!!! Sunday we went to out on the boat again and went tubing! It was really fun but really scary with the waves. I got home about midnight last night! I was so tired I forgot to set my alarm clock and woke up an hour after I was suppose to be at work.
Tonight is going to be my night of rest! I really would love to finish cutting my yard but my arms are so sore from holding on to the tube and the boat that I don't think I could push the dang thing! The only thing that could make this weekend better is if Anthony had been there but he will be home for the poker run in may!!!!

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Got the Go Ahead!!!

First of all let me thank Tonya for recommending Dr. Kot to me. I absolutely love her!!!

Okay, So I had my Dr. appointment today. It was scheduled for 10 and I think I got out about 11:30 so it was not that long of a wait. I really couldn't wait to tell you guys about it. I went in knowing that there were some blood test I wanted done for blood clotting disorders. I told her that the progesterone was low with the last pregnancy. We (well she) decided that we would do the blood test I wanted. She did not give me any hesitation on it!!! Which I was surprised about. She came in to talk to me before the exam, which I liked. She didn't rush through and asked me several times was there anything else I was concerned about. She was very reassuring. She did say that even with the test and the progesterone that I may miscarry again. She said not to give up hope or faith that it may take several pregnancies but that I will have a child one day. She said I was perfectly healthy and did not see a problem with me carrying a child to term. I know that right now we can not tell for sure why or whatever cause my last two miscarriages. She is giving me the "try again and see what happens" approach but she is also doing the testing that I wanted. She wants me to continue with my vitamins and start on a baby aspirin. When I get a positive on a home pregnancy test I am to call her immediately and start taking the progesterone that I was on before when I was pregnant. She is giving me a 200mg prescription of it so maybe that will help the baby stick!!! Anthony has missed this months cycle but he will be home for my April cycle. You guys will probably know before anyone else when we get pregnant. I do not want everyone knowing until the 12 week mark. I don't want to call and tell people that it has happened again. But please be praying for us. I am very excited about this but at the same time I am a little nervous and scared. Thank you all for all your wonderful words of encouragement! Love you guys!!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Bad Day

Today was one of those bad days for me. It been exactly 8 months today that I lost MaryAnn. I really wasn't thinking about it this morning. I woke up with my eyes irritated so I didn't get up and about till about 11 this morning. I needed to go to Wal-Mart and did but I had just been in a funk all day. I went to the book store to get some pregnancy books, since we are starting down that path. I found a book called, After Miscarriage. I got it to read on the reasons and things that they do for it. After getting home, I got to reading it and just couldn't quite crying. I thought that I had dealt with this. I think that its a collection of things that had just bottled necked till today.
Part of it has to do with Anthony being away. I have really missed him this time. Part of it is my cousins insensitive remark the other day about my choice of honoring my children with a tattoo. Even though she has had a miscarriage, she is still not sensitive to the fact that I felt it was a living, breathing person. Part of it is the prospect of us trying again and not knowing the out come of the pregnancy. I want so bad to go back to the time where I never thought I would have a miscarriage. I know that if I get pregnant again it won't be a joyous occasion. At least not until I know that I'm past the 12 week period. I don't know if even then that I will be able to be happy about it. The last few months, I have been thinking and dealing with delivery. Maybe its because subconsciously I didn't want to deal with the feelings that I would have trying to conceive again. The last part is I'm not over the miscarriage yet. I still grieve from my children. I don't want other children I want the ones I lost. I know that that feeling will never go away but I at least thought that by now I would have a better hold on it. I don't know why I would think that. It took me three years to get over my grandfathers death.
I hate being here alone. I just needed someone... anyone to hold me and no one was here. I just don't know if I am emotionally ready for this. I was watching Joe somebody on the TV. He's a preacher. Well he was talking about keeping the hope and faith up. Never give up because the worst happens right before we receive what we want. I know that God know that I want a child more than anything and I know that one day he will bless me with one. My thing is how many do I have to loose to get one? I don't think I'm strong enough to keep having miscarriages. Some women have 5 or 6 before they have children. I don't think I'm strong enough to go through that. The saying comes to mind " If he (God) brings you to it then he'll bring you through it." and the quote from mother Teresa " I wish God didn't trust me so much" talking about the saying God will never give you more than you can handle.
Sorry I just needed to get this off my chest. I have a lot of thinking and praying to do about the things to come. I think I need to deal with the last looses a little more. Oh and we don't know anything about the job in CO yet. Maybe we will hear something this week. Please keep us in your prayer.

Monday, March 2, 2009

As if I don't Obsesse enough!!!

Anthony called me last night for our nightly chat. I was really excited to talk to him, because I was in church Saturday night when he called. (I spent the weekend with Nannie) He tells me that the big guy on the Exxon Rig cornered him the other day (Friday I think). He was mainly picking but asked Anthony if he was a spy, an human resource guy sent to see that everything was going okay. Anthony answers back does he look like Exxon HR? Well anyways after the friendly banter Anthony tells the guy that he does have a degree. On Saturday, the guy calls Anthony into his office and asks him what type of degree does he have. Anthony tells him a BSBA. The guys asks if he would want a job working for Exxon that hire even in times like this. He also asked if Anthony would be willing to move to Colorado! The guys told him he would be making about triple what he is now. I immediately told him "YES!! TAKE IT!!" Of course that was when the excitement of moving to a new place sounded good! Anthony didn't ask any questions cause he's Anthony but he is talking to him again today. I am waiting on Anthony to call me back and tell me whether or not this guy was serious or not.
On one hand, I really hope he was because this is exactly the break we needed to get ahead. On the other hand I will be 20hrs away from any family at all! I am very family oriented. I believe that a child is to be brought up not only by the parents but extended family as well. Aunts, Uncles, Cousin all of it. I have never live more than 1 hr & half from my Nannie! The thought of moving to AL was okay cause at least it was the next town over. This would be a new culture climate (I HATE cold weather) and everything. I know that if this works out then this is where God wants us and he was provide that family atmosphere around me there but its still going to be hard to pack up all our things and move somewhere we have never even visited!! And of course I have obsessed over the housing over there and all that. I just don't know. I just needed to tell someone!